Reception Tips
A Mobile DJ’s Perspective
Written by Omaha Mobile DJ: Steve Bergeron ©

Every Bride and Groom wants to have a smooth flowing and hassle free reception.  There are many things that can be done in preparation for a Wedding Reception that will ensure that the event is enjoyable for not just the Bride and Groom but for the guests as well.

Let us be practical and to the point.  For most Brides and Grooms their Wedding Reception is going to be the biggest party they will ever have to plan.  In order for an event of this magnitude to be successful the following points are important to consider.

1.  Consider how to make the night memorable for you and your guests
2.  Consider what is going to make the guests happy.
3.  Consider how to keep guests from leaving early.
4.  Consider how to avoid keeping the traditional events at the reception from dragging.
5.  Consider what kind of music your guests will most enjoy.
6.  Consider things that might create stress at the reception and how to avoid them.

MAKING THE NIGHT MEMORABLE
 
I often talk with and work with Brides who are afraid of having a “cookie cutter” Reception.  Meaning, they do not want to have a Wedding Reception that is just like everyone else’s.  Often this boils down to the creativity and unique ideas of the Bride and Groom that will make their evening memorable and unique.  For example, a Bride and Groom I worked with last year had their first dance the minute they walked into the reception hall.  They walked in, I announced them, and had them immediately head to the dance floor for their first dance.  It was a little out of the norm to do this but it worked great and was memorable.  So the sky is the limit.  Anything you can think of that is unique is highly suggested to make your evening different and memorable.  For ideas on things you can I suggest you research on the web.  Go to Google and type in Reception Ideas in the search box. 

HAVE TABLES RELEASED FOR BUFFET DINNERS

If you have ever been to a reception where there has been a Buffet style dinner then you have probably seen the mile long line that forms as people wait to get to the buffet.  For those of you having a sit down dinner or no dinner at all the following tips will not apply.  For those receptions having a buffet style dinner my best piece of advice would be to have the tables released.  This makes the dinner look less chaotic and will allow the guests to sit, have drinks, and visit until their table is released.  In addition it will avoid having dinner lines blocking guests from freely walking around and lines wrapping around other tables that guests may be seated at.
If you choose to release tables your host couple, the catering staff, or your DJ can handle this task.  I recommend that you have your DJ do this.  The reason is because you will probably want to have your host couple enjoying dinner with everyone else and the catering staff will be busy with the food.  The DJ is usually playing background music at the time and can almost always accommodate without detracting from their other duties.  As a DJ I love to release tables. It gives me a chance to learn the crowd better and to take some music requests along the way.  Typically I will approach the next table to be released and say “I just wanted to let you know that the Bride and Groom welcome your requests for music this evening and I would love to play any requests tonight that you might have.  So please don’t be afraid to come up and ask me anytime tonight”.  Taking these requests gives the guests a feeling that they are a part of the night and also makes your DJ more approachable.

COMPLIMENTARY BEER, WINE, AND SOFT DRINKS
 
Always (if finances permit) provide complimentary beer, wine, and soft drinks.  Unfortunately the truth is that guests will have a better time and stay longer if they know they do not have to pay for their drinks.    However, well drinks (hard liquor) are typically more expensive and most guests will not be surprised if there is a fee.

BE AWARE OF TIME
 
Ask any Bride or Groom about their reception and most will tell you that the evening flew by.  Why?  Because when you’re the center of attention and all eyes are on you things can get overwhelming, blurry, and time slips by quicker than you think.  At times, it might take a Bride and Groom 15 minutes to walk from one side of the room to the other without them even being aware of how long it took. 
It is imperative that you try to stay on a schedule with your events for the reception while at the same time allowing for some flexibility. 
Consider the following events that occur in the first part of a typical reception:  Introduction, Dinner, Cake, Toast, Bouquet / Garter toss, and Wedding Dances.  That is a lot to get through and if you take your time guest will start to get restless especially if they do not know what is going on or what is coming next.  To avoid the guests wondering what is next Donna Hultman of Cameo Design Wedding Cakes suggests putting place cards on each table that presents a printed order of the evenings events chronologically.
When it comes down to it your Mobile DJ will play a the biggest role in getting you through your events in an efficient and timely manner.  Do not be afraid to ask your DJ to keep you on track with the events of the evening.  After all, your DJ is the MC and should be the one getting the Bride and Groom ready for their next event in order to make a timely announcement.    

KNOW WHERE YOUR THROW BOUQUET IS
 
When it comes time to throw the Bouquet it is a common occurrence for the Bride to not know where the Bouquet is.  With everything else going on I honestly would not expect a Bride to know.  In my experience many bouquet tosses have been delayed because nobody could find the bouquet.  So my advice when it comes to the Bouquet toss has two parts.  First, assign someone to hand deliver the bouquet to the DJ at the beginning of the reception. The DJ table is the safest place for it and the DJ will have it ready when it is time for the toss. Second, if a lot of kids will be attend have two Bouquet tosses. A flower Bouquet toss for the adults and a candy bouquet toss for the kids.
Traditionally the lady who catches the bouquet is the next one to tie the knot, which makes it challenging when the lady who catches the bouquet is four. Kids are a blessing and fun to have at receptions so a candy bouquet is a great way to show that you have thought of them. After the toss for the kids I suggest having prepared extra candy bouquets to give away to all the other kids as well. The parents of the kids will love this and appreciate the thought.

KEEP WEDDING PARTY AND PARENTS IN THE KNOW

When it comes to planning the events that will occur at your reception it is critical that you inform everyone in the Wedding Party and your Parents in advance of what will be taking place.
This will help to save time and keep things more organized during the reception. At a recent reception I called for the Bride and Groom to come to the dance floor for the Bride and Groom dance. After the dance we were going immediately into the Father / Bride dance. After several announcements of me calling for the Father to join his daughter on the dance floor we discovered that the Father had “quickly” gone home to change his shoes. Sounds funny but it actually happened. Had the father known the agenda I do not think he would have left when he did. On a side note, we quickly ditched the Father / Bride dance and proceeded into the Wedding Party dance which took forever to start because four of the Groomsman were outside smoking cigars at the time.
So keep your Wedding Party and Parents informed as to the order of events and which ones they will be participating in and you will have a better chance of avoiding some time wasting disasters.

THE DOLLAR DANCE

What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the term “Dollar Dance”. For some it can have a negative meaning but for others it has a very positive one. To have, or not to have: that is the question. Pardon my play on Shakespeare there but the reality is that this is the question most Brides and Grooms will face.
Honestly, I could go either way. I think the best thing to do is to look at the pros and cons and let you make a decision from there.

The Pros: The Dollar Dance is a great way to receive a little extra spending cash for the honeymoon. In addition, it does afford the opportunity for people to have a dance with you on one of the biggest days of your life. Furthermore, most Receptions have a Dollar Dance so most guests would not be the least bit surprised if you have one. .
The Cons: Some Brides and Grooms feel uncomfortable with the Dollar Dance because they feel as if they are “begging” for money. In addition, Dollar Dances interrupt the fun by slowing things down for what could be anywhere from ten minutes to as long as an hour. Furthermore, Dollar Dances present the perfect time for guest to leave. Not because they are offended but because things will slow down and start giving guest the thoughts of “well, it’s time we got going”.
If you have already made the decision not to have a Dollar Dance then you can move on to the next topic in this article. However, if you have decided in favor of a Dollar Dance let me share some helpful advice to make this run as smooth as possible.
First, the DJ should set the precedent by announcing the following. “Ladies and Gentleman”, “We would like to give anyone who would like… an opportunity to dance with the Bride or Groom”. “We won’t be spending a lot of time with this but we would like to present this opportunity as a last chance to dance with the Bride or Groom and get away with it”.
By announcing this, everyone has been informed that this is not meant to drag out. In addition the DJ has added a little comedy to keep things on the light side. Now it is up to the people who will be taking the money for you (almost always a duty of the Best Man and Maid of Honor). Their jobs are critical when it comes to keeping the line moving. Each guest should have between twenty to thirty seconds to dance before the next person steps up.
Always have the Best Man take money for the Groom and the Maid of Honor take money for the Bride. If you reverse this you will end up with the Best Man talking with his buddies who are in line to dance with the Bride and vice versa. This will extend the time of the Dollar Dance.
I would like to offer one final note about the Dollar Dance. As a DJ I have been referring to it as the “Money Dance” at receptions. When referred to as the “Dollar Dance” most guests will pay a dollar simply because I had announced it as the Dollar Dance. By referring to it as the “Money Dance” Brides and Grooms will usually come away with more cash. Now keep in mind that this is the greedy side of me coming out but the guest will never know the difference between a “Dollar Dance” and a “Money Dance”.

MUSIC FOR THE MASSES (IT WORKS)

Sometimes in a effort to make their evening unique Brides and Grooms will provide their Mobile DJ with a list of music that contains songs not provided in the DJ’s regular play list. It is OK to do this but it can also be a dance floor deterrent if you are not careful. If the music you want is not mainstream and does not cover a variety of ages it will be hard to appeal to your guests and get them dancing.
For example, I once worked for a Groom who was a huge Grateful Dead fan. He expressed the fact that he was surprised that I did not have any of “The Deads” music in my play list that I had provided him. He insisted that if I were to be the DJ that I would have to be willing to play a lot of Grateful Dead music. I had no problem with this and encouraged him to bring any CD he wanted to the reception. During the dance I played 13 Grateful Dead songs specifically requested by the Groom and each song I played the dance floor was empty. The Groom was very pleased with my compliance but with every Grateful Dead song I played more guests would leave. I even had one lady come up to me and tell me that I did not have the ability to “read a crowd”. I have nothing against the Grateful Dead and I am a fan myself. Despite the fact that the Groom was happy it was not appropriate music for this particular Wedding Reception and the guest’s behavior was predictable.
I always suggest having a good variety of recognizable songs that are fun, upbeat, and that will appeal to the masses. Brides and Grooms may dislike the Electric Slide, YMCA, and others that they hear at every reception but consider the fact that guests usually love it and will dance to it. That is the simple reason why you hear these songs at every Reception. A good sign of a successful Reception is when guests are up dancing and having fun.
Each year Mobile Beat Magazine puts out a list of the Top 200 songs that Wedding DJ’s are playing to get people to dance. It is a great resource for Brides and Grooms to use when picking music guests will most enjoy. A link to this Top 200 has been provided here:
http://www.mobilebeat.com/top200.php

In Conclusion

With all the information mentioned above it is important to remember that your Wedding Reception is your day. The intent of this article was to give you some ideas on how to make your Reception run smoother and how to avoid common setbacks in the overall success of the event. If you pulled just one idea out of this article than it was worth the time to write it. Ultimately you are the decision maker. After all, you know your friends and family better that any of your Wedding Vendors. Enjoy the planning process and congratulations!

About the Author:
Steve Bergeron owns Bandstand Music DJ Service in Omaha, Nebraska. He holds a Business Degree from University of Nebraska at Omaha and has been a Mobile Wedding DJ since 198